The Position of Savior is Taken
Have you ever felt like you're spinning too many plates? Like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders? Many of us wear exhaustion as a badge of honor, believing that if we're rested, we haven't worked hard enough. But what if that premise is wrong?
Why Are We Always So Tired?
When asked how they're doing, most people respond with one word: "Tired." We push ourselves past our limits, trying to accomplish everything on our own, and then wonder why we're exhausted, frustrated, and grumpier than usual.
The truth is, we were never meant to carry the burden alone. The position of savior is already taken—and you aren’t Him.
This reality becomes especially apparent in family leadership. When we're exhausted, we don't have what we want to give to our families at the end of the day. Instead of offering our best, we give them whatever exhaust fumes remain.
What Can We Learn from Moses About Leadership Burnout?
In Numbers 11, we find Moses at his breaking point. He had been tasked with leading the Israelites out of Egypt to the promised land—approximately a million people in the wilderness. Predictably, they were complaining about not having meat to eat, despite God miraculously providing manna every day.
Moses reached his limit and prayed a brutally honest prayer to God:
"I can't carry all these people by myself. The burden is too heavy for me. If this is how you're going to treat me, please go ahead and kill me if I have found favor in your eyes. And do not let me face my own ruin." (Numbers 11:14-15)
Moses was so tired of the whining that he would rather die than continue leading. Every leader has a breaking point—even one as great as Moses.
How Did God Respond to Moses' Burnout?
God's response is instructive. He didn't rebuke Moses for his honesty or tell him to just try harder. Instead, He provided a solution:
"Bring me 70 of Israel's elders who are known to you as leaders and officials among the people... I will take some of the power of the spirit that is on you and put it on them. They will share the burden of the people with you so that you will not have to carry it alone." (Numbers 11:16-17)
God's answer wasn't for Moses to become more resilient or work more efficiently—it was to share the burden. Moses needed to learn that he wasn't meant to lead alone.
What Does This Mean for Our Families?
Leading a family can feel like a crushing weight. There are always things that need fixing, crises to manage, and egos to navigate. When children are involved, the complexity multiplies.
From this passage in Numbers, we can draw two important principles:
The Lord honors vulnerability in prayer. It's okay to tell God you're tired, frustrated, or struggling. You don't have to pretend you're fine when talking with God.
The position of Savior is already taken. You don't have to be everything for your family—in fact, you can't be, even if you wanted to.
Who's in Your Village?
You may not need 70 people to help you lead your family, but you definitely need a few trusted friends to walk beside you through the ups and downs. You need people who:
Love you well
Speak truth to you even when you don't want to hear it
Reinforce the values you want instilled in your family members
Parents, ask yourself: Who in your life would you trust to say the same things to your kids that you would say? If you don't immediately know the answer, that's a sign you need to connect with a community.
The Reality of Family Isolation
Many understand the need for a "village," but don't actually have one. As one mom put it: "Sometimes there really isn't a village because you live far away from friends and family, and other times, your child doesn't fit the mold as to what the people in the village are willing or able to care for."
The consequences can be severe: self-care disappears, careers are lost, mental health deteriorates, and relationships break down. Research estimates that at least one in four people experience estrangement from a family member, and one in ten have completely cut off a parent or child.
This sad reality reinforces that healthy family dynamics don't just happen—they require intention.
God's Heart for Family
Scripture tells us that "God places the lonely in families." His heart is for thriving families, whether biological or otherwise. Laying down our pride and allowing vulnerability, empathy, and generosity to flow freely can make room for stronger families and help us bear one another's burdens.
This isolation should not be the reality for people inside the church. The church should be a place where people find the family they're looking for—where they're loved well and connected deeply.
Are We Expanding Our Circle?
While it's wonderful to build relationships with the same people at church, we must ask: Are we actively looking to bring more people into that circle? Or are we just coming to connect with "our people"?
One of the main reasons people avoid Christian churches is painful experiences with church people. According to Barna research, almost 40% of people who no longer attend church cite bad experiences with church people as their reason.
Loving people is messy, but that's what we've been called to do.
Life Application
This week, consider these questions and challenges:
Where are you trying to be the savior in your own life? Identify areas where you're carrying burdens alone that were meant to be shared.
Who are the 3-5 people you could invite into your "village"? Make a list of trusted individuals who could help share your family's burdens.
How can you create space for vulnerability? Practice honest prayer with God about your struggles and limitations.
What step can you take to connect more deeply with community? Consider joining or leading a small group where authentic relationships can form.
Who around you might be carrying their burden alone? Look for someone who needs to be invited into your circle and reach out to them this week.
Remember, Jesus gave His life so that you could be part of the family of God. For those who are part of God's family, may we love each other well, remember that the position of savior is taken, and always be in this together.